Open Letter to a guy I met at a party

We need to talk. This is the part where I’d offer you a brewski, if I drank beer. Would you like a Vitamin Water? Or almond milk? No? Okay then. So we’ve made out a few times now, and it’s been fun and all, but I just don’t see this going anywhere and don’t see … Continue reading

Screw You, Taylor Swift

I am not a very romantic person. Fluffy notions and ordering for each other in restaurants and standing out in the rain don’t really do it for me. I’m more of a “hey I need a date for this event and you’re fairly good looking” kind of gal, or even “I’m at this party alone … Continue reading

Some Ponderings on Hair Colour

God. What is wrong with my hair lately . . . it’s all . . .yellow . . . disgusting. I don’t care how many people tell me it looks nice and “golden” (shudder), I will not accept this travesty. It will be ash, so help me. My last boyfriend first met me when I … Continue reading

Letter to an Ex Boyfriend

Letter To An Ex-Boyfriend Hey there. How’s it going? I know it’s been a while since we last spoke, but I’ve been thinking about you lately, and there are a few things I’d like to ask. I was one of your first girlfriends, so does that mean I’ll always “mean something” to you, like they … Continue reading

Some Ponderings on . . . Why I’m Single

**What follows is a sample of my internal monologue whilst speaking with an attractive member of the opposite sex. Reader discretion is advised for extreme awkwardness.** Okay, okay. Play it cool. No big deal. You’ve got this. Oh shit – Hey. Ohymgodheistalkingtome. WhatdoIdo. Ishouldnothavehadcaffeinethismorningshitshitshit. Hey how are you! It’s pretty hot out there, eh! OHMYGOD. … Continue reading

Hipsters Don’t Wear Hollister

If you are one of the individuals who has stumbled on this publication, like so many have, by googling “do hipsters wear hollister“, then allow me to clarify, once and for all, as a completely unbiased (okay completely biased) third party – THEY DO NOT. UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. WEAR HOLLISTER. If it wears obnoxious glasses, … Continue reading

Some Ponderings . . . On Glasses

I’m just torturing myself. Again. My eyes keep darting upward, praying that you don’t notice but secretly hoping that you do. [My god, English is an inconsistent language. Sorry, tangent. This was a lot easier back when I actually wrote in my diary.] Alright, time to control my field of vision and take off the … Continue reading

Some Ponderings . . . on Relationships, in Haiku Form

She thinks to herself What a perfect waste of a Tube of red lipstick Boys will never car6 What all girls put themselves through In hopes of a kiss Girls will never know What all boys hope they will do In order to feel No one wants to feel Like they have wasted their love … Continue reading

Some Ponderings . . . About Sleep

Sleep at Sea.   I’m tired of vague notions; They change as often as the tide. Thoughts keep swimming ‘round my head. Some get sucked back out to sea, Others left to dry.   I’m not sure what I’m s’pposed to say Or if what I say is right Does it matter, anyway, if I … Continue reading

Dear Facebook

Facebook, I’m breaking up with you. Facebook. I’m not sure how to say this, honestly. I mean, we’ve been together since high school. You’re probably my longest surviving relationship, besides my parents. And my cat. But things have just gone too far. I only spend my time with you, to the detriment of my studies … Continue reading