“Success is the best slap in the face” and other paraphrases

As mentioned, my pal Athena has an inexplicable way with words. If you haven’t already seen it, Hipsters Don’t Wear Hollister will explain it all. Here are some more of her witticisms, delivered precisely at a time when they were most required (more on that later) The Contingency Plan “Heck, I get Cs all the … Continue reading

OMG: Plaid Cellphone Pouch

Smaller than my wallet, more practical than a wristlet, more fashionable than my lanyard, I present to you . . . the cellphone pouch! In plaid. Notice the tiny size, yet the endless possibilities! For the past year, I have relied on my trusty lanyard and id tag to keep my keycard, ID, and metal … Continue reading

OMG: Perry The Platyshirt, The Outfit

I love Phineas and Ferb. I know what you’re thinking: Aren’t I a little old to be watching a kids’ show, let alone buying the merchandise? The answer is, “Yes, yes I am.” I know it’s a show marketed at small children (okay, like 8-14. Pretty young still) but it has an SAT level vocabulary, … Continue reading

Dear Starbucks, or my Relationship with Coffee

Dear Starbucks, Wow. I’m not sure how to say this. I feel like we’ve been dancing around each other for so long. When we first met, you were addicting: warm, sweet, with your clever and attractive packaging. You filled me up inside with a heat, a feeling of boundless energy and limitless possibilities. It was … Continue reading

5 Things to do with a Fake Mustache

I’m playing in a man in the EFUT play this year. Can’t decide if that’s better or worse than dressing as a pregnant women, but a fake mustache is definitely more fun that a fake belly. AND more versatile. Have you ever wondered what to do with that fake mustache you purchased for a halloween … Continue reading

Everyday Things . . . I’m Appreciative Of

Ah, the everyday, the usual, the habitual. All things that we, as a culture, are told are undesirable. But why, exactly? Because it isn’t the movie, action packed, adventure filled lives we’ve been sold? The hero never saves the day by staying in the routine. God forbid he be happy with what he has. The … Continue reading

“Hipsters Don’t Wear Hollister,” and other one-liners from the goddess of wisdom herself.

My friend Athena is the character in TV shows and movies that everyone adores. She is the Barney Stinson of Rowell Jackman (my residence) in that she is everyone’s favourite character (not that she is a womanizer that wears a lot of suits. Though she is awesome.) She says the greatest things that have a … Continue reading

Some Ponderings . . . on Relationships, in Haiku Form

She thinks to herself What a perfect waste of a Tube of red lipstick Boys will never car6 What all girls put themselves through In hopes of a kiss Girls will never know What all boys hope they will do In order to feel No one wants to feel Like they have wasted their love … Continue reading

Procrastination, anyone?

I am a longtime, habitual procrastinator. I’m not really sure how it got started, but I know I have been doing it my whole life, right down to that first book report in the third grade. Lately, I have become more adapt in my procrastination, practically turning it into an art form. Heck, I even … Continue reading